Chuck Norris!!!

[Cartz]

Facts about Chuck Norris:

1. Chuck Norris

[Enlightened One]

Wooooo! Chuck Noris!:cool:

If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.

Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice

[Enlightened One]

Oh my god its.........

[Black Shadow]

Chuck norris is awsomeness!:-D

[dane]

I want to be just like chuck norris when I grow up

[Eolla]

If you want to appreciate Chuck Norris fight scenes, compare any of his films to Richard Gere's "Roadhouse"

[elvanbowman]

I heard on MMM the other day that there is a bridge in Croatia somewhere called the "Chuck Norris Bridge", the DJ also seemed to think tongue in cheek that Loan Wolf Mcquade and Delta Force where the finest films ever made. Dont really agree as Tarantinos' Kill Bill series have revolutionised this genre a bit.

Correct me if I am wrong but I thought that Patrick Swayzee was the hero in Roadhouse, Kelly Lynch was the babe, and Mickey rorke was the villian, with a cameo from Sam Elliot as the mentor cooler. I could be off base here though.
LVNBMN:smile:

[Archangel]

I think someone deserves a Chuck Norris roundhouse to the face for badly mutilating the word 'genre' ;-)

[elvanbowman]

:( Sorry about the spelling, to used to relying on the checker. Didnt realise that it was that critical in the light relief section.:smile:
LVNBMN

[nzo]

When Chuck Norris throws a boomerang its too scardd to come back.

[OldDog]

Chuck Norris is a pussy compared to






















THE HOFF

[Cartz]

The Hoff is Norris' chew toy...

[Enlightened One]

Chuck eats things like the hoff for breakfast:cool:

[OldDog]

YOU FOOLS! Hoff doesnt have to round house kick or karate chop to be lethal.
He just shows reruns of baywatch and millions die of boredom.:cool:



HOFF ROOOOOLS

[Cartz]

The Hoff can't match the Chuck's chest hair...which is made out of steel wool

[Enlightened One]

OMG, the hoff is so lame. Also if he has no roundhouse kick or anything cool what good is he/it :cool:

[BrokenArr0w]

wow, didnt the chuck norris and hoff phase go thru last year?!?

[Marcus]

Chuck Norris is afraid of just one man


















David Carradine
http://marocpeace.org/wordpress/wp-images/kungfu32.jpg

[Liam]

wow, didnt the chuck norris and hoff phase go thru last year?!?

I thought so. :confused:

[Enlightened One]

Please appreciate this picture that i drew of......

[Progen]

OMG, the hoff is so lame. Also if he has no roundhouse kick or anything cool what good is he/it :cool:

He had KITT!!! KITT can run circles around Chuckie anytime!

[SOLAR]

The only reason why KiITT runs circles around Chuck Norris is Chuck tolled him to not get closer or he would cop a roundhouse kick (no armor can stop Chuck)

Chris

[Cartz]

Even God is scared of Chuck Norris...Chuck TOLD God to make earth...

Chuck is also midly perverted...he told God to make man and woman...naked...But he has that right, he is Chuck.

[Progen]

Chuck Norris is SO COOL that he has a bunch of fairies typing cool stuff about him every single day.


Bet you haven't heard that one, huh? It's on the website. Somewhere. Fine print. http://img268.imageshack.us/img268/8940/stupidjz6.gif

[elvanbowman]

:grin: Good observation Progen. Interesting Avatar update too:cool:

[Enlightened One]

There is perhaps only one person/thing that could defeat Chuck Norris....
Chuck simply cannot match his weight. Also he defeated the chicken in the best fight seen cartoons have to offer, im sure marcus will agree with that:D

[Cartz]

.......not true.....Chuck Norris....wait for it.....has caught the greased up deaf guy.

[Enlightened One]

Dear god not even peter could do that!!!!, wait how many trank darts could chuck take before he fell down?:confused: Numbers cannot even describe.:-D. Cartz you have changed my mind, Chuck most likely would kick peters arse but peter is still damn cool and he beat the crap out of that chicken for giving him a bad coupon!:-D

[Progen]

http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com/

More material there for the Chuckie Fairy Fraternity to discuss during their weekly getaways.

:D

[shooting_star]

http://www.ultimateshowdown.org <---Best site ever! lol and has reference to good ol' chuck!

http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com/ <--- where i get all my chuck norris stuff from

Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down.

Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.

Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.

Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.

Chuck Norris invented black. In fact, he invented the entire spectrum of visible light. Except pink. Tom Cruise invented pink.

[Enlightened One]

[QUOTE=shooting_star]http://www.ultimateshowdown.org <---Best site ever! lol and has reference to good ol' chuck!

http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com/ <--- where i get all my chuck norris stuff from


OMG!!:p that Ultimate showdown is the best!! I've watched it 3 time already! poor Indiana Jones my god that would have hurt! great find semra!

[Progen]

Actually, all these 'facts' beg one question.


WHY CHUCK NORRIS?


He's a mighty fine example of a redneck, isn't he? :mad:

[Enlightened One]

Actually, all these 'facts' beg one question.


WHY CHUCK NORRIS?


He's a mighty fine example of a redneck, isn't he? :mad:


Come to think of it i have no idea:confused: but whats done is done and so it shall remain a chuck norris thing:-D

[Cartz]

Because Chuck Norris is RAD

[Enlightened One]

Because Chuck Norris is RAD

AMEN to that!:grin:

[Jesse Pearman aka Woody]

Chuck Norris doesn't mow his lawn, he stares at the grass threatening it on what will happen if it does.

When Chuck Norris was born, he was punching his way out.

[Progen]

Because Chuck Norris is RAD

This one? Dr Rad


:D

[Black Shadow]

OMG i think that you need to find something else to do with your spare time enlightened one cause you can't draw thats for sure :o

[Enlightened One]

There is absolutely nothing wrong with my drawing skills:mad: I was proud of that one:grin:

[Enlightened One]

Oh and by the way black shadow I drew you a picture.......:cool:

[hoyt for life 2]

someone at my school found that chuck norris website with the facts on it (like 23 pages or something) I walked into the common room and every person there had a piece of paper and was reading facts outloud, later most were caught reading them in class. you can still find the odd fact sheet down the back of one of the chairs.

[Archangel]

If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris you're just seconds away from death.

Chuck Norris can lick his elbow.

Chuck Norris can talk about Fight Club.

Contrary to popular belief the Lottery numbers are not random. They are just the number of people Chuck Norris killed that given day.

The agent of Chuck Norris asked Chuck if he wanted to be in Brokeback Mountain. Chuck Norris' agent has been missing for almost 2 years now. Never ask Chuck Norris to be in a gay cowboy movie.

There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist.

[Progen]

someone at my school found that chuck norris website with the facts on it (like 23 pages or something) I walked into the common room and every person there had a piece of paper and was reading facts outloud, later most were caught reading them in class. you can still find the odd fact sheet down the back of one of the chairs.


Looks like there're more fairies around than I thought.

Archangel, I did think well of you before those. :mad:

[Archangel]

Archangel, I did think well of you before those. :mad:
Would you like me to post some Hoff ones to make up for it? :-D

[Progen]

They both have one common similarity though.

Both are failed actors! :D

[StevenB]

Chuck is not failed

[Progen]

Chuck is not failed

We're not talking about Walker, Texas Ranger, are we? :confused:

[Progen]

These bits of trivia are going to garner more fan support for Chuckie.

Eldest of three sons born to Ray and Wilma Norris. Chuck's brothers are Wieland Norris (born July 12, 1943; KIA in Vietnam, 1970) and Aaron Norris. Aaron is the youngest of the trio, the proverbial "runt of the litter."

6-time World Karate Champion; among those he faced for this title are fellow actors Joe Lewis and Steve Sanders.

Often trained with Bruce Lee.

His father Ray was killed in a car accident, shortly after cancer surgery. Part of Ray's throat and chin were removed; a tube was inserted in his trachea to help him breathe. Ray was thrown out of his car in the wreck, and the tube came out. Ray suffocated on the ground because no one at the accident site was aware of the tube.

Reader's Digest once noted a story of how Norris, true to his characters, prefers to find a non-violent way to solve a situation. Norris was in a bar once when a customer walked in and said to him, "You're in my seat. Move." Norris complied, and as the customer sat down, he recognized Norris. He then said, "Chuck, you could've kicked my butt if you wanted to. Instead of moving, why didn't you just attack me?" Norris' response: "What would that have accomplished?" Norris later said the experience resulted in him getting a new admirer and a new friend.

A website known as "Chuck Norris Facts" has been created as a parody of his career. Chuck is not offended by the website, in fact, has said he feels honored to have a website named after him and says he laughs when he reads the facts.

:rolleyes:

[Cartz]

Chuck Norris once challenged Lance Armstrong in a "Who has more testicles?" contest. Chuck Norris won by 5.

[OldDog]

Chuck Norris once challenged Lance Armstrong in a "Who has more testicles?" contest. Chuck Norris won by 5.
Thats because he had lance and 2 other guys testicles in his mouth at the time.:cool:

[Progen]

Come on, don't bring Lance Armstrong into the picture. I used to be a serious road cyclist myself and that man really has determination!

[Cartz]

Thats because he had lance and 2 other guys testicles in his mouth at the time.:cool:

:rofl: good timing ;)

[elvanbowman]

Archangel quoted.

The agent of Chuck Norris asked Chuck if he wanted to be in Brokeback Mountain. Chuck Norris' agent has been missing for almost 2 years now. Never ask Chuck Norris to be in a gay cowboy movie.

And Fair enough, but he may have reconsided for the sequel
157

:smile:

[hoyt for life 2]

looks like it could be something worth watching :D

[elvanbowman]

Looks like a ripper:smile:

[Brocky]

Progen your bike riding days sound like your archery days. I use to be serious but I dont have the determination what else can the man do :o

[Brocky]

elvanbowman surely your not refering to chuck as a girl :eek: .

[elvanbowman]

No Brocky. ;)

I was thinking more along the lines of producer, director, token male love object or something simillar in that film.

Anyhow heres Chucks new game:smile:
271

and for the LOTR FANS:cool:
272

and one for the horror buffs:cool:
273

:smile:

[elvanbowman]

OH YEAH!:D

Found one of his cat too:cool:

274
;)

[elvanbowman]

NO SMALLVILLE tonight again.

Lets fix that then;)
284
:cool:

[primal]

OH YEAH!:D Found one of his cat too:cool:

OWNED YEAH!